on judging...

taken by Bailey
What would happen if no one judged? If, instead of judging, everyone looked at their neighbor in love? I think a lot of people would say that they're not connoisseur judges of everyone they meet. I mean, they never judge people.

I thought the same thing. You know, I have my faults, but judging isn't on the list. Or at least it wasn't.

The girl who judges does not sit at the street corners and openly proclaim her thoughts about so-and-so. They sit primly on the couch, smile at the offender and add continually to their friend's "fault list". 

Judging doesn't have to be huge. Gossip goes hand in hand with Judge. I know I often catch myself telling others (or myself) about how annoyed I am with so and so because of _______. I've spent entire nights worrying about others I know disaprove of my beliefs or something I did. And once that thought slips by, it's more than easy to begin pulling out the faults of that particular person, relishing each one so that I'm justified in what I did (whether is was right or wrong). 

Come on. We're all sinners. We all completely fail, whether or not in the same area. If we're both human - especially if we're brother and sisters in Christ - shouldn't it be our goal to overlook our faults? I'm not saying we can't show them the truth if they're completely in the wrong, but in things that don't matter. They hurt your feelings? Forgive them, treat them with love. They believe something different that isn't essential to salvation? Get over it, and treat them with love. 

So if your friend doesn't celebrate Christmas and you can see how uncomfortable they are in your house with Christmas decor. Respect their conviction, and don't worry about how they feel about yours. We hang up Christmas stockings - some people get offended. We have one of those anti-religious Christmas trees. We have a TV at home. ((these examples are rather unrealistic - but you get the point))

'Let all that you do be done in love'. That doesn't sound like a suggestion. 

Your thoughts?


  1. True. So true. I say that as someone who struggles with this, not someone who has overcome. And gossip is so huge. Sometimes I'd rather hang out with the guys because they don't seem as ready to pick on another's faults as girls are. The sneakiest form of gossip and self-righteousness is the pitying, "Oh, poor girl -- I don't mean to judge but [insert incriminating statement to person who has no business knowing]."

    P.S. I find it irrevocably weird that there is a photo on your blog that is attributed to me. A testament to your amazing photography teaching skills, surely.

  2. I love your posts, Bethany; instead of some long flowery post going over the same point over and and over again, you get straight to the point, and share what's on your heart. :)

    As Bailey said, "True. So true". I agree- guys seem to not be so dramatic. They don't stand around gossiping about so-and-so like women do.

    Another thing I'd like to add is that a lot of times, what we think is just a "casual discussion" that just happens to be about someone, is really gossiping that's sugar coated. Just sayin'. :)

  3. @ Bailey - Come on, the photo had pretty light (and my fingers - which are beautiful *coughs*) -- I had no choice but to give credit to the master behind the lens. ;)

    @ Alexxus - Omigoodness, I completely agree about "sugar coated" gossip. We grow so used to it and forget exactly who were hurting. Well said, well said. And on the side, isn't it unfair how Bailey just takes the amazing quotes and comments - someday I'll go through all her comments and use her amazing lines. ;D - - that wasn't gossip - - was it?

  4. That wasn't gossip -- was it?

    I'm offended.

  5. Wow. Such a good post, Bethany! It's so easy to judge and can be so difficult to overcome.

    Yup, I totally agree with Alexxus on the "sugar coated gossip". Those "little" things we say can actually seem and look like we are "back stabbing" that person.

    *big hugs*

    See you, tomorrow!

  6. P.S. Your new blog make-over is...beautiful! I especially like the sidebar/font!

  7. I think it very clever of us to post about the same thing within a 24 hour period.....

    Great minds think alike.

    But so do little ones.

    Never mind.

  8. What is an anti-religious Christmas tree?

  9. @ Tragedy 101 - That was sarcasm...Some people view Chrstmas trees as 'evil' (they're not exactly "religious" either)...


© Everyday Memoirs
Maira Gall