12.9.12

when God gives you science tests

So, I told God that I did want trials and that I did want to be challenged. I wanted opportunities to trust Him.

And then, it happened.

At first I thought I was getting lukemia because I was having trouble walking or sitting without getting exhausted. Apparently that was one of the symptoms of this one person who got it.

And then I starting getting exhausted in general.

Nobody every told me that the home school sophomore year is super harder than the freshman year.

To be perfectly honest, when I'm exhausted (or emotionally fatigued as my health book would put it) I'm not a very fun person to be around. Fortunately for you, I normally avoid talking to other people in my emotional downy dumps. Unfortunately for me, I'm rather stuck with myself.

Tuesday, September 11, 2012.

I had a bible study that night and I had to prepare snacks and games and clean up the house and hang up the laundry. And when you hang up the laundry and it happens to be whites - it always takes really, really long. My mother, aware of my heated grumpiness, kindly hung the laundry for me. I told myself I was going to be okay now.

So I ran/walked a mile. My health book says you'll feel great for doing so.

That's when God gave me a science test.

I'm a good girl, and so I studied for my test. I looked over my practice problems - of which I missed all except four. Things looked very grim. I looked over the solutions and figured out my mistakes and smiled and smoothed my skirt and told myself that I was going to ace this test.

Five minutes later...

I write my answers on the computer because I have trouble reading my handwriting. My frustration began with Microsoft Word inserting the equation all wrong and making the entire equation the color red. I finally figured out that if you press A / enter / backspace - it makes it alright. That's when God gave me problem 11 (I think).

Something about the radius of a circle and finding the volume in liters. Well, the only measurement I had was meters, and the pi number threw me off completely. I erased it about five times. Frustration was building. Finally, I multiplied a bunch of numbers and just threw in an answer and moved to the last questions which were easy enough. I quick printed it out and glanced over my answers. They all looked atrociously wrong.

And I'll be honest.

I bawled like a baby. I sat at the desk and cried my eyes out because of a science test. I knew that my perfect score average was totally going down the tubes. My eyes hurt, and my throat did too and I wanted to sleep but I couldn't because of weird dreams and insomnia. So, I turned to the last thing I find comfort in (usually). The piano.

I banged out He's a Pirate and something by Edvard Grieg and I was still crying. That's when I realized that I needed to get a hold of myself. My tears subsided after playing He is Exalted as loudly as I could. I wanted nothing more than to sit on my bed and read my bible and talk to God -- who didn't require 15 chemistry equations to get into the gates of heaven.

I actually ended up making apple fritters for the bible study that night. After a milk spill and dropping all the measuring spoons on the floor (and later breaking a window latch and opener) I started going insane by laughing at my unluckily horrible day.

I never really thought of it as a trial, you know.

 Actually, it was only until this morning that I looked back and saw that I didn't only fail a science test, but I also failed a test sent by God. Double oops.

So: lesson of the day - when God gives you a science test, always be prepared. And if you do get a 76%  - you can still praise God that it's not a 45%.

Ironically, I leave now to go do a geometry test. This time I'm ready. ;)

6 comments

  1. Hi Bethany, I've been a reader of your blog for a little while now...and I just wanted to say that I've enjoyed your posts...mainly because you are sooo similar to me :). I'm taking Chemistry this year (and I just finished reading Frankenstein)....my sophomore is pretty hard too! So, just letting you know that you have some one that struggling through the same thing you are. Thanks for sharing your heart...it has blessed me a ton!

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  2. Oh, Bethany! Those days are so hard. I've had quite a few of those of late - though I seem to have just come through the tunnel for a while.

    I know how that goes.

    Love you!

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  3. praying for you, Miss Flop. and remember you're always welcome to send me another super long email, if ya want. :)

    science is fun but geometry stinks. you probably will do a lot better on any of your tests than I ever would (I don't think my brain is able to focus on geometry) so don't cry. 'sides, it's just school. do your best and work hard.

    remember, you're loved by lots of people - PLUS the creator of the universe.

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  4. Can I just say: Bethany, you're wonderful. I'm so proud of you for doing hard things, for taking on life's challenges and responsibilities admirably. You have a challenging school year, not just academically but with all the other things you take on and all the ways you serve within your family, church, and friends circle, and I believe all these are but opportunities to know God better.

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  5. You guys are making me sentimentally cry from happiness. :) Oh, bother!

    @ Kendra - I know, I'll take your geometry (which is my fav. subject...) and you'll take my science and.... ;)

    @ Mama - *hugs* The hug you gave me last night after reading this post made me smile and (nearly) start crying all over again. I love you mom!

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  6. Thanks for sharing your heart, Bethany! And I just wanted you to know that 76% is good for a science test (by my standard:D).

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Maira Gall