the infallible guide to | Wedding Dresses

Less than three months is considered fast wedding planning.
bridal boutiques and wedding dresses aren't meant for three months.
(They're also not meant for normal people who won't spend $1,000 on a dress, but that's beside the point.)

So here's me: a sheltered homeschooled girl who has never worn a fancy dress in her entire life.
Somehow, I end up in David's Bridal crammed in a dressing room with my best friend. Only too late do we realize I'm teensy and these dresses are out to eat me.

My dilemma? I was sadly uninformed. But after you read this 100% genuine article of smartness, you will never be in the same boat I sailed!

What to expect when you don't know what to expect:

{1} Decisions. You walk into a bridal boutique and there are hundreds of dresses. It's the last place you want to be if you are indecisive (likeme.)

{2} Huge dresses. The moment you try on a dress, there will be makeup leftover from the previous bride-to-be. You will be drowning in a blinding wet chiffon mess, so it's recommended to swim to the top of the gown as fast as you can (beforeyousuffocate.)

{3} What hangs on the rack, stays on the rack. Dresses that look hideous on the rack will probably look gorgeous on you. Dresses that look gorgeous on a hanger will 99.99% of the time be sadly misleading.

{4} Know what you want. You will sound like a stupid misinformed bride when you say,

{5} $99 dresses are too good to be true. Unless you prefer walking down the aisle in a mini-skirt.

{6} This dress makes me feel... Some dresses will make you feel like a princess, a fat turnip, or a shaggy cow. If you feel like a hotel + a swan, that's probably not your dress to be. Unless you want to feel like a hotel and a swan?

{7} Veils aren't a question. The moment you put one on - you feel like a real bride. #imabeliever

{8} It's not that dramatic. You won't cry. You won't have a yes-to-the-dress moment. You walk out and feel like a peasant back in your normal clothes. Then you will promptly look up cheap wedding dresses online and sigh.



  1. I knew it was important that we waste all those nights watching Say Yes to the Dress. Now I know why. ;)

  2. I don't know...I had a yes-to-the-dress moment. It fit me like a glove (and I didn't feel like a fat turnip)--except it needed to be hemmed at the bottom. My only regret was that we spent WAY too much on a dress I'd wear only once. My friend rented her wedding dress. If I could do it over, I'd do that.

  3. Oh, how funny.

    I can relate. When my mom and I went on a spur-of-the-moment David's Bridal visit I was a little overwhelmed. I had *thought* I wanted a tea-dress styled gown (simple, right?) but every tea-length dress made me look 20 lbs. heavier and a hipster wannabe bride. Needless to say, I found the gown I wanted after 6 different tries. Of course it didn't quite fit but that's what the glorious seamstresses are for. ;-)

    Blessings to you as you proceed closer to your wedding day! Enjoy it!! It passes too quickly and the end result is far better to be stressed or worried or harried.

    But you probably already know that.

  4. Oh my! I squeal every time I see a new post on here! :D I'm so excited! hahaha Good tips (I especially love the one with "before you suffocate" I've tried gowns on for fun at thrift stores ;) )

    I cannot WAIT! YIPPEEE! YAY for marrying young!

  5. I SO KNOW WHAT YOU'RE SAYING! I left David's Bridal in Green Bay...came home, and spent a couple hours searching for pretty wedding dresses online. I really just wanted something simple and elegant..."So I shouldn't have to pay 2,000 dollars for it...right?!" (The one I wanted WAS almost 2,000 dollars.) I found one just like it (only I like it better) for about $170.00 Needless to say, I was praying about it! lol

  6. Ohmygoodness that was SO MUCH FUN!!!! I had the best time ever....... laughing at some of the funniest dresses ever. There were so many dresses that looked like cupcakes.

    And yesss.....the dresses were WAY expensive....Especially the ones that you actually liked. I am really looking forward to part 2!
    --Emma Joy


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Maira Gall